


gunmetal

by bokutoma



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Canon Compliant, Established Shepard/Garrus Vakarian, F/M, Heist, POV Shepard (Mass Effect), Power Couple, Renegade Shepard (Mass Effect), badass couple, theoretically, when is it?? don't ask me!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-01
Updated: 2020-02-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:55:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22515097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bokutoma/pseuds/bokutoma
Summary: shepard does what she can to get by, and if she has a little bit of fun along the way, so be it
Relationships: Female Shepard/Garrus Vakarian
Comments: 2
Kudos: 16





	gunmetal

**Author's Note:**

> this is a commission for kuuma! thanks so much
> 
> this is not the first me fic i've written, but it's the first i've posted! hope u guys like

There are many things that people the universe over seem to forget about humans, whether they're batarian bastards or asari diplomats. Haneul has been systematically taking advantage of every single one of these overlooked traits, especially since she's been made a Spectre. Fleshy, soft, short-lived, hot-tempered...well, she can't deny that last one, but why would she ever want to?

The best thing about the forgetting (and no matter what she claims, there really aren't that many positives) has always been that no one remembers that humans have fangs, too.

"Formal attire looks like shit on you, Vakarian," she says, already itching in her dress with so much skin exposed. At the very least, this one is floor-length, and affords enough leg movement to run, if necessary, but the bareness of her arms is deeply uncomfortable. She's had worse, though.

Garrus snorts, all derision and mockery (just the way she likes him), and adjusts his collar with the deep discomfort of someone who already knows this. He doesn't actually look bad, but she's used to him in armor, constantly vigilant, constantly calibrating possible points of attack and planning defense strategies, and the change is jarring enough to eat at her.

"I think he looks charming," Kasumi says as she passes by, but the teasing lilt to her voice is enough to cast some measure of doubt on her sincerity. "But I wish you were going to wear something a little...more daring, Shepard."

Even had she not known Garrus better than the back of her own hand, she would have caught the self-satisfaction in his subvocals from a mile away. "Maybe the commander only has enough bravery when it comes to the battlefield."

Without looking at him, she flips him the bird, hoping he sees the studded glint of metal on her finger for the threat it is. Not that she would _actually_ punch him hard enough to leave a cut, but he did have his moments. "Suck my dick."

"Charming as always," Kasumi drawls, and Haneul gets the _distinct_ feeling she's being made fun of. "I would appreciate it if you'd leave that particular brand of charisma at the door for this one, though."

They're doing what they always do, Shepard's crew, causing a little well-intentioned chaos on their way to saving the entire fucking world, except that this kind is decidedly _not_ the one she likes. There's too much playing nice, too much threat and not enough follow-through.

No one has ever accused her of subtlety, and Haneul wishes that the powers that be would stop trying to foist that kind of bullshit on her.

Still, she'll make an effort, even if it's just because Kasumi has asked it and Garrus is coming with her. It's surprising, really, the lengths she'll go to just because those two conditions have been met, but she'll never admit it. Too much blood has gone into her reputation for murder and mayhem to destroy it with that sort of tacit admission.

Besides, her crew members might be catching on to the latter, and frankly, that's just embarrassing.

"I guess you do clean up alright," she admits, earning something almost like a genuine smile from her best shadow. "Still think bloodstains suit you better, though."

"I'm not going to argue that one," Garrus replies, but she can hear the pleased rumble of his subvocals (and when had that happened, that she can distinguish tone when all she registers from most, regardless of race, is anger, fear, and compliance?). He's stopped hiding his scarring, and it adds that military edge that he's never quite wanted but never quite backed away from. She likes it, though. Scars have always been her favorite part of a person (how lucky does that make her?). "Are you going to provide all the lighting for the event?"

"Just when I thought that you two would play nice." Kasumi rolls her eyes, Haneul assumes based on the tone of her voice, but she's already slammed her hip into this turian bastard of hers, checking him with enough brutal efficiency that he does actually lose his footing for a second.

She gets it, though, and she knows what Garrus means. The pride she takes in her scars is practically unmatched; unnatural and glorious, the red that seeps from her skin like a brand is something she relishes, especially in situations like these. Diplomats don't know what to do when war's visage stares them straight in the face.

"I'll practically set it on fire," Haneul says instead of all that, but Garrus knows what she means anyway.

Maybe that's just part of his charm.

* * *

They need funding. That's where half of this idea even comes from, but when Haneul had asked Kasumi for her thoughts (and actually _asked_ , thank you very much. She's always been more than capable of being polite. It's just rare that she wants to be.), she'd already had marks and an opportunity lined up before the question had been fully asked.

"Do you keep track of every major event in the universe?" Haneul had asked, face twisted in something a little stronger than mild disbelief.

"Just the ones in galaxies we're likely to visit," Kasumi had replied, as though that had been in any way normal.

Still, they need funding. As much as Haneul would prefer this to be a shakedown, some sort of brutal force situation where she can throw a few punches, fire off a couple of rounds, those sorts of jobs never do as much as is required to operate a ship like the Normandy.

Diplomacy is, unfortunately, all that's left as a viable option.

Kasumi has laid out the plan, and it's actually fairly easy; back on Earth, Haneul had pulled off harder jobs as a kid. The famous Commander Shepard and the turian some might know as Archangel walk into a fancy party with some of the local best and brightest, play nice, and serve as the perfect distraction for the best damn thief to rob them all blind.

Fortunately, playing nice has more of an emphasis on the former word than the latter, considering Haneul isn't sure when the last time she _had been_ nice occurred. All she has to do is be a slightly toned-down version of herself and run interference with the right people at the right time, and they're golden. Literally.

"Ready for your debut?" Garrus asks, bowing at the waist, and Haneul has _got_ to figure out who keeps lending him the early 21st-century human films.

"Let me know when you feel up to being a gentleman," she responds in kind, and then Joker is entering the orbit of a small moon in the middle of the Buttfuck Nowhere cluster. Garrus's laugh is rough and abrasive, but that makes the whole thing almost worth it, even if she does have to wear a dress.

They touch down, shuttle unnecessary when they're actually supposed to be recognized, and Haneul reaches reflexively for a gun that isn't there.

"Still think it's drastically out of character for me to go anywhere without a gun," she mutters resentfully.

Another dry laugh. "If you think you're charming enough to get away with getting one in, feel free to try your luck."

When she corners an attendant and tells them in no uncertain terms that she _needs_ at least one of her guns, she manages to convince them, and flashes her best friend (her partner) a smug grin.

"I'm plenty charming, Vakarian, and don't you forget it."

Infiltration is easy, and it's easier still to loop her arm through Garrus's and stand with a soldier's straight spine, surveying the room with every inch of cold regality she possessed. Hunters had fangs, predators had keen eyes, and humans, in their way, had both.

There's some level of surprise in the gazes of those they pass, some level of entrancement with the odd couple she is certain they make, and the quietest huff of laughter comes through as Kasumi uses this to her advantage. Haneul is vaguely tempted to make various, obvious rude gestures, but even she isn't willing to blow their cover so thoroughly for the sake of a little petty satisfaction.

"You'd think they've never seen a human-turian couple before," Garrus quips, and there's no hiding the almost cruel snort that elicits from her. "Maybe this is how we ambush _every_ enemy."

This is how they bond; whether they're pinned in a corner by gunfire or conversation, clad in armor or as well dressed as Mess Sergeant Gardner's chicken. They're back to back, side by side, arm in arm, affection laced in the casual slope of their shoulders, noticeable only to a practiced eye.

Turians have fangs too, and maybe that's why they get along so well.

"The man on the left," Kasumi says, crackling through the most subtle of earpieces. "Not the richest, but he shot at Kenji once. Didn't hit him, of course, but that's not the point."

There's little grace in the way they extricate themselves, but they're more impenetrable than the newest of the turian dreadnaughts, two battering rams dressed in fine fabrics.

"Can we scare him a little?" Garrus asks, all slavering, wolfish smile. "I miss intimidating people. It was the only part of C-Sec that was worth all the bullshit red tape."

He already knows her answer, though, and they've got the twin fires of danger and exhilaration blooming in their eyes.

And in the end, if they leave a body count behind, what does it matter when they're saving the whole goddamn universe?

**Author's Note:**

> i'm on twitter @kingblaiddyd! currently i'm off my shit bc of the magnus archives, but i've got varied interests lol


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